Familiarity Breeds Contempt

Matthew 13:54-58

Coming to his hometown, he began teaching the people in their synagogue, and they were amazed. “Where did this man get this wisdom and these miraculous powers?” they asked. 55″Isn’t this the carpenter’s son? Isn’t his mother’s name Mary, and aren’t his brothers James, Joseph, Simon and Judas? 56Aren’t all his sisters with us? Where then did this man get all these things?” 57And they took offense at him.

But Jesus said to them, “Only in his hometown and in his own house is a prophet without honor.”

58And he did not do many miracles there because of their lack of faith.

Familiarity Breeds Contempt

               Many of us are familiar with the old adage that “familiarity breeds contempt”.    We see here that this was true even of Jesus among those where he had grown up.  Often when we come to know someone quite well in relationship our perception of him or her tends to change.  For instance, in our marriages that man or woman that we married may have once been our idol, our dream and the one with whom we were completely enamored.  All that we saw in them were these wonderful qualities that we fell in love with.  After a few years of marriage, we have seen them enough times without their shining armor or princess gown that we are more than familiar with all their shortcomings, weakness and failures.  What is interesting is the paradigm shift that we can go through in our minds.  Far too often the one we loved and admired the most becomes the one we now have no honor, respect or have admiration for.  Familiarity has bred contempt. 

               This same principle can hold true with children concerning their parents, in the workplace, friendships and even the church.  It is important that we take a moment to consider how the Father views us.  Obviously, there is no one more familiar with us than the Father.  He knows better than even we do all our strengths and weaknesses and yet the amazing thing is that He doesn’t view us with contempt.  He doesn’t dishonor us, or belittle us or ridicule us.  He sees beyond our faults and meets our need.  He knows that none of us are without fault or sin.   What He sees in us is His Son.  In the Father’s love He will deal with and discipline us for our good, but it is not because He doesn’t like us or despises us.  If the Holy Spirit would come to us and just open up our eyes to who we are in the natural in the light of His holiness, there is not one of us that wouldn’t be undone.  We would totally despair of life and hope because we would see our profound filth and wretchedness.  God doesn’t do that to us.  He deals with us a little at a time as He is transforming us into His righteousness.  What is so wonderful about the Lord is that He is not focused on our sin and weaknesses, He is focused and is teaching us to focus on who we are in Christ.   The flesh is corruptible, but we are now birthed of an incorruptible seed.  Our identification is not in what we were, but in who we are and what we are becoming in Him.  “He is all our righteousness, we stand complete in Him and worship Him.” 

               When we can only view another person with contempt because of the shortcomings we see in them or because we view them as common and not of importance, we rob ourselves of the blessings that they have, to bestow upon our lives.  It was true of Jesus as He entered and ministered in His hometown.  All they could see was Jesus the son of Joseph and Mary, the carpenter’s son.  They could only see him after the flesh and the natural.  This blinded them to seeing Him after the Spirit and who He was in God.  That lack of faith robbed them of the blessing that could have been bestowed upon them.  We can do the same thing with those that are closest to us.  If we only focus and declare another person’s failures and shortcomings, then the death that we are declaring is robbing us of the life we could be receiving if we would speak into them what God speaks into us.  We all have failures and weaknesses.  We can all justifiably find fault in one another.  If we are only focused on the negative in one another then that is what we feed and nurture.  The contempt will eventually grow into destruction and destroy that we once loved and cherished. 

A preacher once said, “A big shot is just a little shot away from home.”  We are all little shots, but God wants us to focus on how big He is in us.  2 Corinthians 5:16-17 says, “Wherefore henceforth know we no man after the flesh: yea, though we have known Christ after the flesh, yet now henceforth know we [him] no more. Therefore if any man [be] in Christ, [he is] a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.”  If we are having issues of contempt for someone, maybe it is time that we get our eyes off the flesh and begin to know them after the spirit.  If we are only looking at them after the flesh, yes they will always disappoint us, but let us view one another as the Father views us, with love and compassion.  Rather than taking offense in another’s weaknesses, let us pray about how we can minister the strength of Christ into that weakness.  How can we speak words of life and encouragement that will help them to come forth and find strength in their weakness?  It is easy for any of us to judge, condemn and find fault, but that is not what repairs the breach.   It is the love and grace of God working through us that helps to mend, restore and change through our godly words, actions and prayers.   Let us speak to one another concerning our faults in love to the end that we may strengthen one another and let us, as James 5:16 says, “Confess [your] faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.”

Blessings,

#kent