Faith that Separates Us unto God
September 20, 2022
Faith That Separates Us unto God
Hebrews 11:24-29
24By faith Moses, when he had grown up, refused to be known as the son of Pharaoh’s daughter. 25He chose to be mistreated along with the people of God rather than to enjoy the pleasures of sin for a short time. 26He regarded disgrace for the sake of Christ as of greater value than the treasures of Egypt, because he was looking ahead to his reward. 27By faith he left Egypt, not fearing the king’s anger; he persevered because he saw him who is invisible. 28By faith he kept the Passover and the sprinkling of blood, so that the destroyer of the firstborn would not touch the firstborn of Israel.
29By faith the people passed through the Red Sea as on dry land; but when the Egyptians tried to do so, they were drowned.
There is something in most of us that causes us to shrink back from the rejected, the unacceptable or unpopular ones of our society. We may even have a compassion for them, but we don’t want to be identified with them because by association we fear the same rejection, ridicule and reproach they are suffering. Our inclination is to be among the acceptable, the popular and well regarded of people. We have seen this type of social behavior from the time we were little children all the way through into adulthood. Think how Jesus’ life might have been different had He not chose to associate with sinners and tax collectors, if he would have just hob-knobbed and got in good with the upper religious class of His day. Perhaps life would have not turned out so harsh for Him and perhaps we would still be perishing in our sins because we would have had no Redeemer of all of mankind. If our Lord had been a respecter of persons, where would that have left many of us?
In this passage in Hebrews 11 we view an example of an individual whose whole life was a diadem of faith. Often, we associate Moses with the law and legalism, but his life was an Old Testament parallel of Christ. Moses, even like Christ, had it all, authority, power, riches, might and dominion concerning earthly kingdoms. Even like Christ he chose to be identified with the slaves and downcast people of God rather ‘than to enjoy the pleasures of sin for a season.’ It says, “accounting the reproach of Christ greater riches than the treasures of Egypt.” Egypt was a representation of the world and all that it has to offer us. Many of us spend our whole lives trying to gain what Moses already had and gave up.
Moses was a man of vision. If we have no vision then we will only pursue that which is directly in front of us. Faith gives us vision to see with the mind and heart of God in order that we may pursue that which is eternal, but which is often ludicrous to natural minded men. When by faith we begin to gain a God perspective of our world, our values and our goals change. We begin losing our fear of what men think, what is popular or what will get us into the right social circles. All of that becomes shallow, empty and hollow in the light of God’s vision. By faith, we too, can begin accounting the reproach of Christ greater riches than the treasures of Egypt. The world is caught up in the lie that life is all about our personal success and us, when nothing could be further from the real truth. Moses truly discovered life when he discovered a relationship with All Mighty God. The world could have never given him, what he gained and experienced in God, but it personally cost him everything. He bore the reproach of men, even the people of God, but the favor of the hand of God rested upon him. He knew a relationship and friendship with God, that most men can only dream of, but Christ has made it possible for each of us through the Cross.
Today God’s call upon our lives is not to pursue the world or the things of the world, but to pursue Him and seek first the kingdom of God with all of our heart. Jesus tells us in John 15:18-25, “18“If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first. 19If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you. 20Remember the words I spoke to you: ‘No servant is greater than his master.’[b] If they persecuted me, they will persecute you also. If they obeyed my teaching, they will obey yours also. 21They will treat you this way because of my name, for they do not know the One who sent me. 22If I had not come and spoken to them, they would not be guilty of sin. Now, however, they have no excuse for their sin. 23He who hates me hates my Father as well. 24If I had not done among them what no one else did, they would not be guilty of sin. But now they have seen these miracles, and yet they have hated both me and my Father. 25But this is to fulfill what is written in their Law: ‘They hated me without reason.’
That badge of rejection and shame in the world is a badge of honor in the kingdom of God, for it declares that we love and care more of the praise and approval of God than we do of men.
Faith has the vision to bear the reproach and separation with the world that it might be identified with Christ and His eternal kingdom. Our faith must not be one duplicity, but singleness of heart and purpose. He bought us with the price of His blood. We are no longer our own, but His. Draw near in full assurance of faith, despising the shame and looking unto the ‘recompense of reward’ even as Moses.
Blessings,
#kent
Joy Cometh in the Morning
June 30, 2020
Psalms 30:5
For his anger [endureth but] a moment; in his favour [is] life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy [cometh] in the morning.
Where is your life spiritually today? Would you characterize it as nighttime or daytime? Most all of us, who have been walking in Christ for a time, know that we go through seasons in a spiritual sense. There are times we go through such close intimate times with our Lord and sense His presence and love in such a wonderful way and then there are those nighttime experiences. It may come as a result of allowing sin to come into our lives. It may be the result of God’s chastening or dealings in our lives. It may be through persecution or tribulation. Whatever the reason it is nighttime experience, one in which we fail to sense God’s presence in our soul. Our prayers may seem hollow and of none effect. These are times when spiritually we cry out for God, perhaps it is in these times we really begin to seek God’s help, His presence, His deliverance through a trial or tribulation we are facing. There are times our lives can feel pretty bleak. Our circumstances are overtaking us. Where is God?
King David experienced this nighttime ordeal before He became King. Psalm 30:7-9 says, “
LORD, by thy favour thou hast made my mountain to stand strong: thou didst hide thy face, [and] I was troubled. I cried to thee, O LORD; and unto the LORD I made supplication. What profit [is there] in my blood, when I go down to the pit? Shall the dust praise thee? shall it declare thy truth? Hear, O LORD, and have mercy upon me: LORD, be thou my helper.” Perhaps you and I have prayed prayers similar to this. One thing that is so admirable about David and I think a spiritual key to us overcoming in these dark times is that David, no matter how low, remembered the goodness and the faithfulness of God. He continually brought God’s promises and His benefits before the Lord in his prayers and psalms. And he never ceased to praise and thank God even in those dark times. He was quite honest with God about what he was going through and the emotions that wanted to overtake him, but he always brought his thoughts and focus back to a place of faith in the faithfulness of God. We may go through some long nights that may go for years, but learn those principles that David learned. They will sustain you in those times. David even says an interesting thing in this passage, he says, ” by thy favour thou hast made my mountain to stand strong: thou didst hide thy face.” Have you ever thought of your mountain as favor from God? Remember that what God is allowing in your life is designed to press you into Him. He wants us to learn and trust Him for who He is, not what He can do for us. This is the place of maturing faith where the rubber meets the road. God has to become very real to us or we give up and turn away. God is processing us through the hardships of our life. “The trial of your faith is much more precious than Gold” (1 Peter 1:7a)
In this scripture David says “joy does come in the morning”, our trials, darkness and seeming separation from God won’t last forever. He is faithful to bring us through if we faithfully hold fast to Him. David’s next expression after talking of how severe the trial says, “Thou hast turned for me my mourning into dancing: thou hast put off my sackcloth, and girded me with gladness; To the end that [my] glory may sing praise to thee, and not be silent. O LORD my God, I will give thanks unto thee for ever.”
If you are in your night season, don’t be discouraged, have hope, God has not forsaken you. He is proving you and bringing you into whom you really are in Him. Stand the test, stay the course, for joy comes in the morning.
Blessings,
#kent
A Word from the Lord
November 10, 2015
A Word from the Lord
Romans 13:12
The night is far spent, the day is at hand: let us therefore cast off the works of darkness, and let us put on the armour of light.
Leave this day the things of the earthly realm behind you. Look into the dawn of the New Day for from the East arises your salvation and from the West the sun is setting on the former things and the things of this time and place. Open your heart to me and I will fill it. Open your mouth to me and I will fill it. Open your hands to me and I will fill them. I will be your supply and your provision. All of your need is met in me. Lean not upon the arm of the flesh to feed and provide in your day of want. I am your Provider and the supplier of every need. Lean not upon your own understanding, but lean on the council of My Word, for it is the light unto your path and a lamp unto your feet. Take care that you walk in the light of the council of my Word. It is a sword to prove you, to divide and separate soul and spirit. Far too long my people have been a mixture and double-minded in their ways. Let your eye be single and your heart true to the calling that I have given you to walk in My ways and obey My commands, if you do this, then do you love Me. Far too long my people offer up the oblations of praise and worship, but their hearts are far from me. Outwardly they do their homage, but within their heart and their thoughts they entertain wickedness and impurity. I do not judge the outward man, but the inward man, the man of the heart. What value does a beautiful cup or vessel have if it is full of abominations and wickedness? The fire is sent to purify that which I have sanctified. It will burn with unquenchable thirst until there is no more left to feed its desire. Mercy and grace will wet and temper the steel of godliness in my people, lest they be consumed in judgement. My people shall turn to me from the least to the greatest and those that are mine shall gather beneath My wing. There I will shelter them from the storm. It is a time of pruning and separation so that those who would bear fruit may do so more abundantly and those that are dead upon the vine may be cut off and cast into the fire. What a man has sown and what he is now sowing will bear its fruit and he shall eat the fruit thereof either to life or to death. Take care how you plant into your life and into the lives of others. Clay pots hold divine life. Only as they are emptied are they perpetually filled. Stop holding the life till it becomes stagnant and putrified. Pour out that which I place within each one of you. It is only in giving that you truly receive. Release the life. You are not vessels for storage, you are the vessels of daily use to wash the feet of common people and make their way clean and sure. Some of you say, what do I have to give? Give your life, your service, and My love that abides within you. With Me there is never a lack of supply or increase. You are shallow, because your deeds are shallow. Become the vessel that is tipped over and poured out. If you sow sparingly you will reap sparingly. Revelation is coming, but it comes with a price. It must be received with humility and obedience. The revelation of the Most High is revealed in what you live and not in what you know. The revelation of Jesus Christ in you is revealed through a crucified life, laid upon the altar of obedience and service. Today is the day to seek Me and lay all else aside. I am your refuge, your hiding place, your mighty fortress, but you must truly know me to be hid in me. It is no longer about outward actions of religion and godliness, it is a day to know intimately my heart and come into the inner sanctuary of relationship and abiding that is only found in intimacy and relationship. Come quickly, for the days are getting short and times and seasons are at hand. Rouse you up out of your sleep and slumber and come away with me. I speak these things to you, because I love you. Let him who has an ear hear what the Spirit is speaking to the Church. It is the day for the Bride to prepare herself and make ready for her Groom. Take heed and act quickly.
Blessings,
#kent
Continue in What You have Learned
July 7, 2015
2 Timothy 3:12-17
In fact, everyone who wants to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted, 13while evil men and impostors will go from bad to worse, deceiving and being deceived. 14But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have become convinced of, because you know those from whom you learned it, 15and how from infancy you have known the holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. 16All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, 17so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.
Continue in What You have Learned
If you want an easy road to travel then being a true disciple of Christ is not one you would probably choose. We like to focus on the blessings, but the reality is that this is also a road of sufferings and persecutions. Many like to wear the label of Christian when it benefits them, but if they really have to start enduring the cross, then they are out of here. In this day and age we are moving into that time when evil will become more forward and perverse, from bad to worse, just as the scripture says. We need to be aware and have come to the commitment, that though it cost us everything, we have decided to follow Jesus. When the Lord winnows and thrashes the wheat in His judgement. He is separating wheat from chaff and is judging who is really His and who is not. If our faith is just about God’s blessings then we might want to exit now. Romans 8 tells us “if we suffer with Him then will we be glorified with Him.” Jesus is the pattern Son; the prototype of what He is conforming us into. Certainly His life was not without suffering and persecution. He even told us that if we were of the world the world would love us, but because we are not of the world the world will hate you. This is why it is so incredibly important that you have a revelation of who you are in Christ. When the fire comes it will reveal what the house is made of. All that is wood, hay and stubble will be consumed and only that which of gold (God’s nature), silver (His redemption) and precious stones (His glorious truth) will remain. If our house is not built upon the rock it will perish. So it doesn’t matter how much we know or how often or long we have been going to church. If you don’t have the inward relationship of obedience and trust, you will not stand. Jesus didn’t tell us that if we love Him we would hear what He had to say, He said if we love Him we would keep His commandments. If Christianity is just churchianity and knowing the truth, but not living the truth, then that will not preserve you when persecution comes. The baptism of fire is purification; it brings to the surface the dross so that it can be purified. God is judging His own house today to allow us to see the dross in our own lives and deal with it, before we must truly be judged for it.
If you want to live “godly” in Christ Jesus then expect persecution and don’t be surprised when it comes upon you. Let us be as Paul exhorted Timothy, “But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have become convinced of, because you know those from whom you learned it, 15and how from infancy you have known the holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus.” The Lord has imparted Himself into us through His Word and through the Holy Spirit. We have all that we need to endure and make us wise unto salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. We know that Christ is synonymous and one with the Word of God, because, “ in the beginning was the Word and the Word was with God and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning. (John 1:1-2)” Paul testifies of this truth as he states, “All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, 17so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.” We are the Lord’s army in training, preparing for the day of battle. Our battle is not with flesh and blood, although it will most likely be manifested through them, it is with principalities, powers, rulers and dominions of darkness. But Revelations 12:11 reminds us, “And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony; and they loved not their lives unto the death.” One of the things that is very difficult for us, especially in this western culture, is our love and affection for self and the flesh. For us everything is about survival and preservation of the natural man. God has simply given you this natural body as a cocoon and preparation to carry you into your eternal being. When and if we are ever faced with the choice of our faith or preserving our natural man, what could be more glorious and a greater opportunity than to offer ourselves up as a sweet –smelling sacrifice to our Lord. Walk with Him, obey Him, honor Him and “KNOW HIM” without doubt or reservation in your inter-most being.
Blessings,
#kentGod, go
Abundant Life
June 22, 2015
John 10:10
The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have [it] more abundantly.
Abundant Life
When we talk about abundant life, where do your thoughts go? Do they go to your natural man, your financial success, your health and the resources of this world? Indeed God’s abundant life touches us on a natural plane, but if that is where our focus is then we’ve missed the bigger picture.
If the thief, which we know as satan, only comes to steal, to kill and destroy, then why are so many non-Christians blessed and prospering in this life. The quality of life we are talking about here is the Greek word Zoë, God life. One definition states, “life real and genuine, a life active and vigorous, devoted to God, blessed, in the portion even in this world of those who put their trust in Christ, but after the resurrection to be consummated by new accessions (among them a more perfect body), and to last for ever.” While satan is out to steal, kill and destroy, his focus is upon the “God life,” not the just the breath of life. When the Zoë of a person is robbed, killed or destroyed then what hope is left for a man? Separation from God is the ultimate darkness. While some may scorn God in this life, they have no concept of the life they have forsaken and given up.
The Apostle Paul brings this concept of abundant life into more focus in 1 Corinthians 15:9. He says, “If in this life only we have hope in Christ, we are of all men most miserable.” Paul wasn’t experiencing the abundant life as a big bank account and vacation home in Athens. In this life he experienced great tribulation and hardships. The revelation that he had was that this natural life was his investment into the abundant life he knew in Christ. It is not the seed itself that is the abundance, it is as it dies and gives place to the life within that abundance is released. It is not in the corruptible that we find the fullness of abundant life, but in the incorruptible, the resurrection life.
It is not in the abundance of this natural life that we rejoice or find the proof of abundant life. If we are blessed in our natural lives that is all well and good, but that is not the measure of God’s abundant life. Your abundant life is found in Christ. It is in your relationship with Him and the hope you have in Him. This natural life is but a corruptible seed planted in the ground. The question of abundant life is in what it brings forth through its death, not what it possesses in this life.
We want our life seed to possess the DNA of Christ in it. He is the essence of our abundant life, in this life and that, which is to come. Don’t allow satan or any one to steal that from you. The faith we have in Christ lives out of the abundance of who we are in Him.
Blessings,
#kent
The Passion of Our Hearts
June 1, 2015
The Passion of Our Hearts
Psalms 86:12
I will praise thee, O Lord my God, with all my heart: and I will glorify thy name for evermore.
As Christians, brothers and sisters in Christ, we come from many different backgrounds and influences in our lives. We’ve even congregated and gravitated to groups or denominations that most reinforce our particular view, opinion and understanding of God and scripture. The primary problem we find with this is that it tends to separate us into different camps and we get caught up in internal squabbling over our sacred dogma or opinion. It seems to me that in this hour the Spirit of God is working in His body to tear down these walls of division. He is still “one body, and one Spirit, even as you are called in one hope of your calling; One Lord, one faith, one baptism, One God and Father of all, who [is] above all, and through all, and in you all (Ephesians 4:5-6).” While it is fine for us all to have our own opinions about scripture, there are certain foundational truths we should all embrace and be in agreement about. What the Spirit of God wants to speak to us about is that our faith is not just about what we think or just us, it is about Him and what He thinks. The Word and Christ teaches us that the most important commandment is that, “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy strength, and with all thy mind; and thy neighbour as thyself. “ This is the foundation upon which all of the law and the prophets hinge and rest upon. If we miss this we are building upon sand. We all know the adage, “Divided we fall, united we stand”. This is why it is so important that unity be restored back into the body of Christ. Psalm 133:1 reminds us, “Behold, how good and how pleasant [it is] for brethren to dwell together in unity!” When part of my body starts conflicting and fighting with other parts I get sick and I can no longer function to my potential. God desires for us to lay down our pet peeves and doctrines and start becoming one with the rest of the body of Christ concerning what God’s will and purpose is for us in this hour. We must learn to build each other up and not tear each other down.
Isn’t it funny how when we meet someone and discover that they are a Christian, the first thing we want to ask them is, “where do you go to church”? We are more concerned about seeing what brand or mark of religion they have on them than seeing if the mark of Jesus is in them. We are all at so many different stages in our walk with God and most of us would agree that have been Christians for some time, that our views and ways of seeing and understanding things has changed over time. We may not have even accepted ourselves for the way we are now if we were judging ourselves by what we use to think and believe.
The thing that should be driving our lives is not our religion or denomination, but our passion for Christ and our love for Him. God sees men after the heart, not their denomination or belief system. What do you love the most? What is your deepest passion and desire? That is where Christ must be at the forefront or we are missing it. Our love and compassion for others should be a close second. Let us focus on what is important to God’s heart and not just our intellectual satisfaction. When we love and are able to lay hold of the truth, the truth will set us free from our wrong opinions. Often we think it is our duty to set everyone straight on how to believe. We need to quit stepping on the Holy Spirit’s toes and let Him do His job. Our responsibility is to judge our own hearts and make sure that we are walking in faith and obedience to Him. If we are all impassioned with Christ that will be our bond of fellowship and communion with one another and with Christ. Allow God’s law to be written upon the tablet of your mind and heart. “The letter of the law kills, but the Spirit gives life ( 2 Corinthians 3:6).” God’s Word will guide us and His Spirit will give us peace. Be at peace with your brothers and sisters in Christ. Love them where they are at and if you have a greater revelation or insight then speak it through the way you live your life and in your actions. Above all things, be passionate in your love and pursuit of Christ.
Blessings,
#kent
Closing the Door on God’s Forgiveness
December 5, 2014
Matthew 6:14-15
For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 15But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.
Closing the Door on God’s Forgiveness
One of our most blessed benefits in knowing Christ is our ability to call upon the blood of Jesus to forgive us of our sins when so often we stumble and fail. 1 John 1:8-9 teaches us, “If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. 9If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” With that promise of forgiveness in 1 John also comes the condition that Jesus gives us in Matthew 6:15. God requires that we give forgiveness to receive forgiveness. We can no doubt all think of times when others may have done things to us that are, in our minds and hearts, unforgivable. God would ask us a question. What if He considered the things we have done in our lives unforgivable? None of us can attest to deserving or earning God’s forgiveness. We have all come, or at least should have come to the realization that we have fallen short of the glory of God. We are all sinners standing condemned under the law of God, estranged from God except for the grace of the blood of our Lord Jesus that has atoned for us. For all of those who have acted in faith in asking Christ into their hearts to be the Lord of their lives he has washed our sins away, casting them as far as the east is from the west.
What if God continued to hold a grudge, an offense or unforgiveness in His heart towards us? How would that affect our relationship with Him? It would obviously bring a separation and estrangement again from His fellowship and love. That is exactly what we do when we hold on to an offense, resentment and unforgiveness for others. Our offense toward others becomes God’s offense toward us. Some of us would say, ‘but that isn’t fair, you don’t know what that person has done to me or to someone I love’. Is there anything that God has refused to forgive you for?
Yes, there are some horrible, detestable and seemingly unforgivable acts that one person can perpetrate upon another. They are not right and they will be judged, but we are not the lawgiver and judge. That is God’s department. We can’t control the behavior of others, but we are responsible for our own. We can’t always control how we feel, but we don’t have to choose to live and act according to our feelings. It is Christ that now sits upon the throne of our hearts. He is to be the ruler over our mind, will and emotions. We have been called to walk after the Spirit and not after the soul. Often that is a very hard position to align ourselves with when we are carrying deep seated emotions of anger, hate, resentment and unforgiveness. It is not a switch that we can just turn off and on, but it is something that the Lord can help us to come to terms with if we will allow Him too by opening our hearts and being honest about where we are at.
We must understand the principle that resentment, resistance and retaliation, repels love.
What is God’s nature? Love. When we hold these things in our hearts we are switching off His love, which is the light to bring us to healing, forgiveness and reconciliation. We may never be reconciled where we have the same relationship with a person that we once had, but the important thing is that we have reconciled the offense caused by someone else’s behavior or bad decisions with the love of Christ that abides in us. This often stands contrary to how the world acts and behaves, but we are not of this world, we are a kingdom people with the kingdom of God residing within our spirits and lives. That means we live and operate our lives out of the context of kingdom principles.
At some point and often at many points in our lives we struggle with these issues. What we must realize and remember is that resentments and unforgiveness will always do more to hurt us than the people that we are offended with. It is not our love, but the love of Christ in us that is the ointment and balm of our healing. It is His love in us that is that power to release the unconditional love and forgiveness that He has released toward us. If this is an area in your life that you are struggling with then, for your sake, open that door of forgiveness that God’s love and forgiveness might flow back into your life. He wants to set you free. How else can we give forth the love of God if it has never been tested in our lives?
Blessings,
#kent
The Deserts of Marriage
October 24, 2014
The Deserts of Marriage
1 John 4:11
Beloved, if God so loved us, we ought also to love one another.
Tears once more roll down the streambeds of her cheeks. Her heart is broken, discouraged, without hope, as once again she a has surveyed the landscape of her marriage only to see what appears to be but a desolate desert with the only moisture being that of her brokenhearted tears. Between the sobs and heartbreaks she only sees the ruins of what have been the years of her youth, the investment of her life, feelings and emotions. Dispersed in the pain are the feelings of anger and resentment that are like the cactus and thorns that are among the few things that now grow in this desert that is called a marriage.
Somewhere, in another room, another place or perhaps a bar, there is a man sitting quietly with his head hung down and a lump in his throat. Is this finally the end of the line? Has our love totally shriveled up and died? Has my insensitivity and inability to meet her needs put the final nail in the coffin of our marriage? Have my selfishness, my insensitivity and her continual nagging and criticism brought the closing act to our marriage?
Both lost in their thoughts and hurts think back to when they first met, their younger days of romance and early marriage. How different it was then. It was like the Garden of Eden. They were so in love. They never wanted to be apart. They thought about each other constantly and there was hardly a time when either of them could do wrong in the other’s sight. Things were so perfect. They dreamed together, they talked of what the future would hold for them and what they might accomplish together. Their hearts were swollen full of love and joy. They had found the perfect mate, the one that would fulfill all their dreams, expectations and fantasies. She would be the perfect submissive wife. She would live to meet and fulfill all of his needs. She would cook and sew, raise the kids, make the place a lovely home, always continue to be cheerful, joyful and full of love. She would be there when ever he needed her to meet his every need as his companion, friend and lover.
She likewise had the picture in her mind that he would always be there to share his heart with her, to spend lots of time communicating and talking. He would always be fun, exciting and making her laugh. He would often show up at the door with gifts and surprises, take her to unexpected places and constantly sweep her off of her feet with romantic ways. He would be her security, her tower of strength. He would provide for all the desires of her heart and fulfill all the dreams she had as girl. He would become rich, but still have bountiful quantities of time to spend with her.
As our honeymoons fade into the reality of everyday life we start to gain a greater and greater revelation of shortcomings of this one that we married. Many times our enchanted dreams of all that our marriage would be begin to slip into disillusionment as this person of our dreams begins to become more of the nightmare of disappointment to us. That person that could do no wrong, slowly becomes that person that can do no right. We begin to verbalize these complaints in hopes of changing our spouse’s behavior. On the other hand they are seeing all the places that we disappoint them and fail to meet their expectations. Most often a lot of shouting gets done, a lot of emotion gets expressed, but the results are far less than we hoped for because our alienation from one another only deepens and our intimacy grows less and less. We find ourselves dividing from the oneness we once shared into two emotionally separated islands dwelling under one roof. Hurt, resentment and anger continue to grow into walls of division, until we find ourselves at the place where this couple now stands, at the door of separation and divorce.
Jesus said in John 15:12-13, “This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you. Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.” Who is a closer friend than our spouse has been. Are we failing to keep the commandment of Christ when we fail to truly love one another? There may be a hundred reasons why they are unlovely and unlovable to you, but we have to factor in who we are in Christ Jesus. Did we have to earn our love from Him? Did He wait till we were good enough and met His expectations before He came and gave His life for us? Romans 5:8 says, “But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” When we see our human love in the light of His agape love, we see how shallow and empty it can be. The greatest problem for all of us in our marriages is our own selfishness. At the center of all our complaints is “my need isn’t being met.” Often one of the greatest problems for our disillusionment with our spouse is that we may have entered into marriage expecting them to meet areas of need in us that only Christ can meet. They are never going to be able to meet those needs in you. They are not a replacement for your intimate relationship with your Savior. We need to be complete and secure in our Lord before we ever enter into a relationship with a spouse, because He is your source of true and greater love. He is the one you can turn too, not only when your spouse fails to meet your needs, but also when you fail to meet theirs. We should enter into marriage and keep the perspective that I married that person to make them happy, marriage is not about me, it is about them.
When we gave ourselves in marriage we pledged the most important part of ourselves to one another, our hearts. It is to the shame of many of us that we have become very careless with that precious commodity that was entrusted into our care. Often we have dropped it, stepped on it, abused and misused it. We have not tenderly loved, protected and cherished it like we promised to do. If we are to keep Christ’s commandment of love, even to the one we promised to love, it can only truly be revealed as we abide in His unselfish love. If our commitment could be again to always submit ourselves to one another in unselfish love. Can we have enough of the unselfish love of God present in us that we would make it a priority to consider and minister to our spouse before ourselves? Can we obey the Word of God to release the offenses, the hurts and the unforgiveness that have become the walls of separation between us? If we can’t truly exercise and practice the love of God in our homes, how will we succeed in demonstrating it to the world?
Don’t lose your hope. Don’t give up or give in, there is a love that conquers even death and it can bring life back into your marriage. Let us come together and commit our hearts as one before Him who is our reconciliation. What is impossible for man is not impossible with God. When we become reconciled to God’s will and love for our lives with each other we will find again the joy and fulfillment that we had lost. Streams will come again into the deserts of our relationships, as the love of Christ is truly manifested in our hearts and lives. God hates divorce, but He has made a way for us to experience and find more abundant life in our marriages, if we are willing to become one in Him and the unselfish nature of His love.
Ecclesiastes 4:12, “And if one prevail against him, two shall withstand him; and a threefold cord is not quickly broken.” Think of the natural and spiritual strength that you have, as the two of you are one in Christ.
Blessings,
#kent